Excerpts from a Diary

Black Out

My girlfriend and I had a conversation the other day about "Blacking Out" on the people that we know and a forced to endure on a daily basis.

We were discussing the merits of waiting until the opportune moment before "unleasing" on someone. The possibility that a misplaced piece of lint could set off an amazing torrent of profanity and name calling on long time friendsis enough to make this discussion Blogger worthy.

She suggested indulging in the practice often, just to get stuff of my chest. Although I see the long term benefits of establishing dominance and volitility early in a relationship, it is a little harder to swallow the jagged little pill of abused relationships and spoilt friendships caused by the misuse of my "Blacking Out" powers.

We projected that our personas were much like that of superheroes or villians, that with extreme emotion and the right circumstances our undefinable natural and awe-inspiring power of "Blacking Out" can be tapped and released on our foes.

It was interesting to note that although we had both had plenty of reason to "black out" on a few people in the pass couple months, there were many moments when I just could not imagine doing so. I think "blacking out" should be reserved for the most extreme of circumstances. Like if you had dorm-mates that just did not know how to clean up after themselves. The type of people that are just not able to to follow instructions even when they are written down. I would reserve it for the people that you almost get a reflex when you are with them.

Although I completely understand the moments when you want to black out on someone that is worthy but the situation does not call for it. For instance the people that move like molasses in the winter time on the sidewalks in New York, or any other big city for that matter. It is just ridiculous to thinkn that they are not there for any other purpose that to move slowly in front of me. The people that stare up at buildings while waiting for the light to change on the sidewalk. The annoying folks that are on their cellphones but stop you to get directions and proceed to hold to conversations at the same time - "Listen buddy! Are you talking to me or him???"

Or how about the people that get in line at the supermarket with a few items and then leave the line (and the girlfriend) to go back into the aisle to collect an armful of stuff of the shelves and return to register - like they did not have a century and a half to get all this stuff done while they were actually shopping. A BLACK OUT moment if I have ever seen one.

It is strange how we can sit and talk about the process of simply "going off" and showing our "true colors" to complete strangers for their lack of courtesy and to acquaintainces for the stupid things that they do. But as the term implies, experiencing, whether it is on the receiving end or the giving, a black out is not something you can plan.

Consider the term in its real world usage. When a city or town experiences a black out it is caught off guard. It is an unexplained glitch to daily life that may lead to injure if it takes people unawares. It is quick and shocking to the system. It leaves you disoriented and dazed for a moment and when the power finally returns you are left reeling. Even the idea of blacking out (fainting or passing out) is almost the same thing.

In the emotional sense, "blacking out", often times equated with the black female, is much like that. But at the root of it all there is always a trigger that has set everything in motion.

I need everyone to contemplate this theory, the next time I black out on someone.

posted by Onika @ 2:54 AM